Sunday, July 25, 2010

Doggie banter...

We took Crayzee Daizee to the dog part today and she got to play with a great dane named "Lexy" and a little mix named "Odie" (who was one of the puppies found in a rubbermaid container at Odell Park). I had to mind a testicle toting chocolate lab who was humping the crap out of her non stop. Like - she couldn't take 2 steps and he was on her!! She tried to drink and he was on her! She'd stop - he was on her! Where was the owner?? Well - Mr. Chuck Norris Wannabe was sitting merrily on the bench watching the entire thing!!! (note - if you're sitting on the bench while your dog is mounting the crap out of other dogs, know 3 things...
1st - you're stupid and I don't like you cuz you're a bad dog owner!.
2nd - It's not hawt for the the dog being humped...they are not having fun and will not need a cigarette afterwards
3rd - You need to cut his damn nutz off!!!
Needless to say, after I barked at "Mr. Nutz" twice and DH physically removed him from Crazy D - both the owner and dog left with ther nutz in tact. (ugh that makes me mad!!!) I know it's a dominance thing but holy crap!!! When that is allllll your dog wants to do - put him on freakin estrogen or something!! ( or maybe get your damn ass up off the bench and mind your dog!!!

Ok - moving on. CD decided to go...as in #2. DH - as is typical - groans in disgust and frustration. (*note - Mr. Rugged and Manly will vomit if he has to pick up poop. He has been known to vomit off of the front deck if he tries and so...His groans drive me mental since I am the one left with the dirty deed!! While he's groaning at the poop - I'm groaning at his disgust cuz I'm always always...did I say always?? Cuz I really meant ALWAYS have to clean up CD Poo! (Gawd knows I love the man but holy crap! no punn intended) Anyway...the point of this point is that if you let your saint bernard - Vege-terrier cross eat lots and lots of baby carrots...weirdness will happen the next day! lol I was concerned for a split second until I realized it was only carrots...then I I thought "cool!"...then I cleaned it up and carried on. (It's weird that I thought poo was cool I think)

After play time was over, we took sleepy Daisy home and gave her a bath. I washed and hosed and scrubbed while thing 2 fed her enough cheese to keep her entertained and keep her from runnign...and now - she's asleep on teh love seat upstairs (which I will also have to bath this afternoon)

And...with any luck - we'll get to leave for vacation at some point this week - if I'm able to make arrangements with "Mary Puppins" :) More on that later :)

4 comments:

Kirsten said...

your life entertains me

Queen Mel said...

Is Mary Puppins Jay?

BTW, Mr. Nutz is an idiot. I would be seriously pissed off! Thank god I don't have a dog because that would just give me more to be mad about! :)

prittykitty said...

OMG! Owners that do nothing while their dogs try to hump others drive me crazy!!

I stopped taking Gussy to the park because of the bulldog(everybody knows which one this is) that kept trying to hump poor Gus - A MALE DOG for the love of Gawd! - and the idiot owner just kept watching and laughing. Putz!

prittykitty said...

And yes, Mel, I am "Mary Puppins". Daisy is currently running around my backyard with Midget while Gussy takes a nap.